Dharma and self-realization, finding truth

Death will not leave off any one, whatever he may be. It continues to threaten all; if it is another's turn today, it is yours tomorrow.

Baba

Writing it down helps to get aware of it, to realize it. Writing is listening, because we have to listen to be able to write and that is how we learn to listen, therefore, writing is good.

It is more than just writing it down, to realize it, it is listening and thinking it over and we get absorbed in it and if we get absorbed in it we get answers.

When I began with observing, I was at work and after I had decided to go for it, because there had been respect in the air and I was holding it up high and it ended in self-respect, it had to go on till the end. There was no way we could stop before, because it was about self-respect, but I didn’t think it would be that difficult.

That is how I began to observe, because it had to do with respect and that felt good, it felt right, it was the right thing to do without that I could tell why. It was direction of Dharma.

That respect had to do with a new manager and I thought, great I will work with him, that is what I want, I thought, but I fell in love with him and that was rather complicated. So I had to forget him, so the first part was just to get into it and the second part had to do with self-respect and getting out of it and letting go and in the end was the observer and the higher self and that is all I loved, afterwards it was easier to let go.

What felt like respect was nothing but what we know as Dharma, by itself it went into the right direction. That is getting absorb, I write about it and go into it and it is there, the insight and it begins to make sense and it flows. That higher self got us free from the inside and it was a new beginning.

But I didn’t understand it, because it was ‘light’, it was ‘He’. I knew that was all I wanted, but I didn’t know how to get there. It went into direction of right knowledge.
It was insight, but I knew I didn’t understand it. It was reflection but I didn’t know why that reflection was there. It was the result of going in direction of self-respect.
I didn’t know where to go and where to look for it.

I waited to know and it took always a lot of time.