Sublimate the Three Gunas

Human beings are a mixture of Divinity, Demon and Human (Daiva, danava and manava).

The wickedness of the ogre can be overcome by the quality of mercy and charity (daya), sympathy and empathy. Pride can be overcome through self-control (dama), detachment, and renunciation; Egoism can be overcome by following the code of conduct (dharma) prescribed by the impartial sages, and by channelizing your instincts and impulses into fruitful action.

When these three Gunas are thus sublimated, Manava (human) is transformed into Madhava (God).

Make the best use of your Guru. Acquire from Him the skills for winning peace of mind and bliss (shanti and santosha), the Grace of God, the lessons of spiritual practice (Sadhana), and the fruits of good and holy company (sathsang); do not fritter away your energy and time, seeking sensory satisfaction in ungodly company.

SSB

 

The time when Baba was leaving the body I was in Prasanthi Nilayam and felt during the whole time nothing but scared. It was not on the level of a happy and joyful time we had experienced in the ashram before. It was heavy and first I wanted to leave and go sightseeing to just get away, as others did, but there was a kind of energy and I knew I had to stay.

It was that sad that I felt constantly scared. 

Already when we arrived we made a detour and it took a long time to get there, it was in the midst of night. The ashram was closed and tired from the flight, I went into a hotel room, I just had to sleep and it was in front of the big hall.

I had not been there for about eight years and it felt that different to the ashram I had been used to, it never felt normal and okay.

It was like arriving on a place I didn't know and somehow it didn't feel okay. Everything felt scary, that whole situation. Baba was in my dream and said, he would get me out of that in about a week time and that if I would not go to Bhajans I would miss it.

Therefore, I had to get up and went. It felt that depressing I didn't want to get up and go out of the door. It felt even scary to walk to the ashram door. It felt like strange people around, I had never felt that strange before and I was scared to ask for the room, we were donors and I also felt scared of people. And when I asked for the room, they didn't give me the room, because I was a single lady. That had made sense until now, but in this moment it didn't make sense, because of being scared of everything and also the people I would have to share the room with. It was kind of upside down. Because there was constantly that feeling of being scared in the air, I couldn't possibly be in a dormitory with eight women. So I staid in the hotel and it was every day difficult to walk to the ashram just to get inside.


I had never experienced the ashram like that before.
But I guess it had to do with Baba leaving the body. It was in the air. And I was used to seeing the ashram peaceful and happy. He was in my dream and we went down a well and there was only little water left and we went up that well again and on the way he dropped the body and it fell into dust and on the top was Krishna and his brother.
But in my mind I was not able to know what I knew inside, that he would leave the body, it was too sad. I asked him even inside before he left to not leave and what I would do without him? He felt that close. And in the morning he left at 7.40 am and didn't sleep much that night and he woke me up and said, 'no more husband, nothing left but an empty Western shoe'.
I woke up scared again, because I knew something had happened. It was the time he left, but he was present until the last moment. 
And the next day he was present again and asked, how it looked now?
 

Inside I knew, but outside I didn't know. But in the ashram lots of people said that he would come back and it was too sad to listen to that, I didn't feel like sharing and I couldn't, I had to stay alone.

They said Shirdi also came back, but inside I knew it would not happen and I didn't want to hear it. I needed to stay with the reality how it really was, because it was too precious and it felt like he was always present, but at the same time it was that feeling of being scared.

And there were scary dreams. One dream was a real agony, he was alone in the wheelchair and somehow exposed to people and nobody was able to attend to him properly. It was a nightmare to get aware of it.

And once I was in a mud hole and we were not aware of it and my daughter was small and playing at the wall, and when the rain began and the mud came in and it was that fast, I got aware of the danger too late and said, 'lets go out of here', but it was already too late. The mud came in and at the wall she was already covered by it and there was only a small hand reaching out for me and behind was Baba's voice and he said, 'and what now?'

If I tried to help her, we both died, if I left she was lost anyhow. I woke up in panic and called her to know if she was okay.

In the mean time I know the mud hole had a lot to do with my ex and the impossibility to arrange things properly, he didn't care. In the beginning I wrote him to feel better or still hoping things would get better, but that was somehow not possible, instead of getting out of it, probably it got even worse.

 

Human beings are a mixture of Divinity, Demon and Human (Daiva, danava and manava). The wickedness of the ogre can be overcome by the quality of mercy and charity (daya), sympathy and empathy. Pride can be overcome through self-control (dama), detachment, and renunciation; Egoism can be overcome by following the code of conduct (dharma) prescribed by the impartial sages, and by channelizing your instincts and impulses into fruitful action.
 

I was not used to see it as wickedness of the ogre, I saw God in my parents ,as Baba said we should or at least I tried to do it, because in many ways it was easier to idealize them than to find faults and to just go on getting aware of it by insight, because parents give us the opportunity for self-realization and therefore, we should be grateful.
I had felt that reality of self-realization in the air during the time I was writing a diary in the parent's house, at that time I was about seventeen and had to go in that direction. But afterwards it was not present anymore and the question was, why it was gone and what was the reason behind. 

There was always something wrong, and I didn't know what it was. As it seems it was just not possible to talk and there was pride, it was present as precipice, but only understood right after I knew Baba's teaching and words well enough to get aware that a precipice has to do with pride, it was like distance to things, thinking that it is not necessary to take care or it. Pride was not about self-control and detachment, but the opposite and there was no mercy and that felt kind of disturbing. We felt rather judged and not seen in a light of self-effort or self-respect, but just blame.  

After my father died, he was in my dream on a dark place and he couldn't get out of it, the light was far away like a small star. I told everybody about it and got some kind of reaction, only from my mother not. It was about ten years after his death and I had to follow the inner master and it felt kind of disturbing that there was no reaction, but not the slightest notion that she heard what I said. I therefore didn't know if it was because of the father or because of me, but I had to follow the master and fight to the end and therefore, I had to know. Therefore, I wrote it down and send it to her and explained the matter and that I wanted a feedback. It was just a dream and not a big thing, but they made something else out of it.

She didn't talk to me, she talked as it seems to my younger brother who has only problems. He seems not the right person to talk to about such things. Afterwards the inner master said that he does the worst he can do, it was like a chain reaction. Following the inner master, the result was a catastrophe.

It came up later on, it was the worst he could do.
The result was that it felt like incest in the air and that was kind of awkward, the reflection of a real disturbed relationship level, backbiting, finding faults with whatever was not okay in their mind because they thought that it was not possible to be proud about it. It came up in the eruption of a hidden volcano, and volcano is ego. It was reflected in the insight or dream as dirt and over and over covered with black dirt kind of like spots of lava.

That was the result of writing down the dream of my father after his death and telling them that he was at a dark place and the light was far away.

It felt sad.
Seen out of the light of the ogre, it was like that had taken control over it and turned everything into something bad and into dirt.

It was kind of difficult to understand that pride was the reason behind, for sure no sympathy or empathy as we didn't even get an answer as it seemed to me a simple question.

There was no mercy and I even wondered how a brother was able to write down such stuff. They have no idea about self-control and detachment, and finally we get to the conclusion, what did we expect?  

 

When these three Gunas are thus sublimated, Manava (human) is transformed into Madhava (God).

 

We in the West don't know about the three Gunas and last time in our study circle we talked about it and there was someone who had not even the slightest idea about it and the question came up what was meant with Sathva, what I somehow had expected as  being 'clear'.

Conclusion, we are in the West a bunch of Ogres and what can we expect from that? First we have to know how to be human, before we can get to divinity.

It is not done in one step, for sure not.

 

Make the best use of your Guru. Acquire from Him the skills for winning peace of mind and bliss (shanti and santosha), the Grace of God, the lessons of spiritual practice (Sadhana), and the fruits of good and holy company (sathsang); do not fritter away your energy and time, seeking sensory satisfaction in ungodly company.

 

But that is the problem. We have to live with it, we have to learn the lesson and we should anyhow not fritter away our energy and time in seeking sensory satisfaction in ungodly company... but that is in our children, it is in the family, and they think it is normal and we are strange.
It is even in the devotee we met, it was hidden, and also that devotee or
so called devotee just took advantage of it that we wanted to be good and dedicated.

It is everywhere, we live in the West and there is no ashram, no place we can be in good company only. How can we not live in that society?

There is not much of that type of good company, and we end up being alone and what can be achieved alone? 
But in understanding it, we can be in peace with it and go on ...
And that is the exercice, winning peace of mind and bliss.