Installed in our Hearts, He will Redeem our Lives.

Mantra means that which saves, when meditated upon. The Name of God, any one of His countless ones, can serve the purpose. The Name is like the goad that can tame the elephant in rut, make it bend its knees and lift the log on to its tusks. 

Liberation (Moksha) is not a five-star hotel, or a deluxe tourist home. It is just the awareness of your reality and the rejection of all contrary conceptions. You can recognize your Self quickly and clearly, if you purify your heart with a mantra or by the singing of the glory of God. Both will grant you that boon. Sing from the heart, conscious of the layers of meaning that each word has. These are the surest ways to have God firmly installed in the throne of your hearts and it will redeem your lives. 

Baba (thought for the day) 

Being with TM thinking we got a so called personal mantra, but it was given by age and it said because we use it, it becomes personal and it was said that it should solve all problems. That made it that we were not careful, didn't know anymore how and when to finish things right, because we thought meditation would take care of it. We went into stuff and relationships, we probably would not have otherwise, because we would have thought it over twice before doing it. 

If we think that all problems can be solved by a method or technique, we are not very careful, go ahead, certain nothing can happen and our life gets in no time upside down. It was taught like that and inside we were convinced in doing TM we could do nothing wrong as long as we went on with meditation, which took care of everything, that means we didn't finish anything properly and if we noticed it was not as we would like it to be, we again thought meditation would take care of it. It was moving with the wind, no character and no idea what was done really. 

It was also a kind of take off, only it was about everything and just going beyond everything we would use common sense usually. 

It had to lead into troubles, if it didn't work and it was all based on the believe that it would work, but what if it didn't work and it doesn't work as we know in the mean time. It just lead to the blind believe people were evolved spiritually and better than others, they didn't see problems anymore and for everything it was the standard answer, TM will take care of it. 

Yesterday I went to Amma's Darshan. She is here until tomorrow. This morning I woke up and noticed it was great. And I wondered, what has happened? 

It was certainly not done by meditation, we had no time to meditate. As I always see people I know from the time in the Baba ashram, we were talking. In that time I hardly ever moved away from Baba's ashram, I was glad if I didn't have to leave and missed him already if we didn't see him in one Darshan, therefore, who wanted to go away? I had no reason to go away, but every reason to stay. 

But a lot of unfinished business was waiting for me in the background and it accumulated during TM time, it had piled up and looked like a huge pile of dirty dishes. 

If we feel we can see it, it seems like eagle sight, seeing it out of a higher distance and from far above. 

All began because I wanted to fly, I was fascinated by the yoga sutras and that person who was teaching the siddhi prep course was also about flying and with him I decided to go for the Siddhis and the yogic flying instructions. 

I didn't know jet much about the secrecy policy of TM and after that course, I went back to my parent's house and not to Paris, because my former relationship was not at all interested in that. That is why the relationship didn't go on. Coming back I was shocked because my brother had only problems and he was not yet eighteen. I went with him to the south of France to that TM-teacher, because it was good for him to get away from the parent's house for a while and I thought he was a good teacher.

Later once in driving back from Spain, I couldn't sleep because of the way the parents had behaved and made me responsible for their stuff and in the dream it said that they were responsible for the state of mind of my youngest brother, and the inner master said that he does the worst he can do, whatever that is, I guess we don't really want to know.  

After coming back it felt inside like soulmate, and I thought great, that is the right direction to go. We met again and planned with him together to go for the TTC to be able to teach together. It was not only my decision, but it was our decision and therefore, it was after that course in the air as 'marriage'. 

He and some others planned to go to La Réunion to initiate people into TM and asked Maharishi for the blessing, so he was gone in no time and I went for that teacher's training, but as it turned out it took much more time and it was all learnt by heart. On course I noticed that everything was learnt by heart and therefore, we had to teach in the language we did it and I did it in German thinking it would be possible to translate, but that was not possible, as it was all learnt by heart and he didn't tell me, when I realized that it was not possible to do what we had planned, I began to hate him and I didn't write him anymore. I went on that course with the purpose to initiate together and it turned out all differently. I was fed up and had with that kind of engagement on his side no intention to do it in French. 

After the course was over, there was 'marriage' in the air, we met the Maharishi and I asked about the higher self, we had hardly any knowledge about it. He explained it on science level, what didn't tell me anything, but I had a feeling of going on an on, it was very strong and in the air and I told him how I felt and he nodded.  

I just went on, thinking in going on and on TM would take care of it. And soon I began to work with the National Leader who was constantly at the phone, but he was looking for a wife. One day I felt 'exposed' to him and didn't know why, it was not anymore in tune with my inside feelings, TM had cut me off of it. 

From the inside it had shifted unnoticed to the outside, it was not anymore the higher self, but he seemed to be the highest first, because he was personal staff of Maharishi and the leader. The inside feedback went on being negative. It said, if we don't know the source, we cannot understand it, nobody there who said why and how to get it?  

The highest first was in the inner view, direction soulmate who was gone and on La Reunion. The discrimination between inner seeing and outer appearance was gone. That is how it began to show the situation in a different light. It broke in pieces, there was a beautiful sun-shine background. It was no more right. People appeared as puppets on a string, but the hand was not there which should have been holding them, they didn't know what they were doing. Because he was no friend, the leader, no yogi and yogis are our friends, all other appeared as enemies, because he was the leader. After coming back from a course, I hoped it would get better, but it was even worse, there was a scary, big, black hole in my meditation, it also said it was trust lost.

Only about a year I got surprisingly in touch in the facebook with that TM-guy I had lost all contact afterwards and that is how that background came up again. At that time we wanted to fly. Baba said after he had left the body, 'I wanted to fly' and in thinking it over to the extent that we understand it finally, we remember again how we got into TM. 

'I wanted to fly' was the inside motivation. First it felt like soulmates, but it got lost with that course and after it was about working together and husband ...and resulted in that 'marriage', but it was already all upside down, because there was 'marriage', but no husband.  

That is not really possible. And as I was working with the leader, after finally it became a relationship, it was in the air as exposed. I didn't see that yet as truth and hoped it would get clear later on. 

In a dream Baba was present as the 'insight', he was the insight and the following step. With TM there was no following step, no consequence, but the hope that it would get clear later on and that is how it piled up, the following step was left to meditation and that didn't work, because he is the doer and if we meditate, we are the doer.

I still tried to find how it should go on and I could see it break into pieces inside behind a beautiful sunshine environment. That felt again very strange. The source lost, we didn't remember that we wanted to go in that direction because of the soulmate, he was gone and about husband that was no question. It was soulmate in the sense that we both wanted to fly and we wanted to initiate together, that had switched on husband level. How that happened I don't know, probably because we had to sign a notary commitment and we all thought it was about keeping it pure and secret, but that is just the cover, the real reason is the commitment that created the 'marriage'.  

It was taken all too easy going on not being aware how we got manipulated in the background. It was never what it seemed, it was always different. I had mentioned the higher self to Maharishi and he talked about Brahman, not what I wanted, but there was a feeling of going on and on, therefore, I mentioned that it felt like going on and on and he nodded. 

As Baba said in the inner view, 'I wanted to fly' the key was with that insight and in time it came up again, it was that confused on the mind level, Tamas, upside down, it was about commitment, but we thought it was about keeping it pure, therefore, it felt like marriage, but there was no husband, we had signed a commitment and were not even aware of it. Tamas puts things upside down, nothing was as it seemed, but nothing. 

I lived with someone in Paris. He didn't want to fly, but he began with TM, but he had not inclination into direction of flying and that is how that relationship didn't go on and the new direction was the soulmate, teaching the Siddhi prep course. 

In the inner view I was convinced that we would fly one day, in my dreams I was floating often in the air. Also the intuition improved, there was a place in Bordeaux, an unknown city to me and I parked the car close to a church and the street we wanted to go was just around the corner and that without navigation system. It felt amazing, we thought it was the support of nature. 

Last year only over the facebook I got in touch with him and as he is with TM, it is all verbal, nothing to tell, only meditate and that is how he wanted fast to go into it and talk etc. and no problem, TM like, but this time we asked questions and got always the same answer, I don't understand. In the inner view was a glass house and a car, but the doors closed. 

The TM glass house, from inside it looks like we can see the sky, but from outside, it is a glass building only and not universal as they claim to be and the door was closed, he couldn't drive out of it with the car and he is not aware of it that he is in a kind of mental prison. That is how it looked in the inner view and Baba is the insight and the following step. 

As he said again that he doesn't understand it, finally it was also in the inner view that it is all the same with those people, we have no case. That was the end of it and how it was taken care of it. 

Knowing that it is Baba, we don't question it any further, everything is said we just get aware of it.  

He was actually responsible that it got lost, that the TTC was not planned properly, it ended all in the air and the following years and years of inner view which showed that it was all wrong, it is all due to that and that I went with that guy into TM. 

It happened with him together. Baba is the insight and the following step. 

It came in the inner view up as 'divorce' that was how I got aware of it that it was about 'husband', he was the lost husband. And after the marriage was with TM, everything was upside down, nothing was as it should be.

He always repeated that he doesn't understand it. Until it was in the inner view, 'that it is always the same thing with those people, we have no case'. I guess, they don't know what they are doing and they don't see any responsibility. 

As it was not possible with the TM policy, everything secret, to know ahead, he should have told. Afterwards it was no-more possible to know who was wrong, if he just didn't care enough, or if it was TM, how to know? Today he would like to go for it, but not like that. It was upside down and that is Tamas. 

In the end someone else felt like soulmate, and there was a lot of effort to know why, but no answer. For years and years I lived the nightmare of TM, lots of questions, no answers. 

Afterwards in the inner view the leader looked like an actor, not like a yogi, that was the wrong level. Yogis are our friends, but he was the leader and personal staff of Maharishi, that is how all turned into enemies, he was the leader. 

And also that guy didn't see any responsibility. 

Because of that guy I went for it to be able to initiate together, it ended 'marriage' with TM, because we signed an agreement. 

That is how we got trapped and it seemed nothing made sense anymore. 

Going on and on ..., it mirrored that they were puppets on a string and the hand which should hold them was not there. It was all upside down.

I still hoped it would get normal again after a course I went back to the center, but there was a big black hole, the master was not present, the marriage and nobody there, no husband, the soulmate, no answers, the leader was a replacement partner, therefore, the black hole, and in the end in the inner view he was an actor and in the inner view there was a great inner light which absorbed him. 

That was the next step after Baba he was present as 'actor'. 

I got some Baba books and a little vibuthi was still in it and as it said that it has healing power, I put some on my tongue. It felt like a very fine feeling and flow in direction of the heart and intensified in the heart until it was a small dark blue form, divinity in the heart. 

That was a great experience. 

But the hope that it would be over and all done, that was all in vain. Baba said in my first interview, that is very difficult to understand and I did nothing else ever since that working at the insight and getting it right, because he is the insight and the following step, seeing it that way it is easier to get it right. Follow the master. Fight to the end and finish the game.

Baba tells, first discrimination, second we have to see it in our own life and third go on no matter what obstacles are there. 

That is Tapas, spiritual work, spiritual discipline.

Trying to get it seemed a long time all in vain, as the source was still not known, first I had to find the lost source again and that was the connection between soulmate and husband.  

If we just think all is done, it is too easy, it gets a habit in the mind to think that easy way and thinking if we do that, all problems will be solved. It is a trap and Tamas and not spiritual work. 

In the inner view never all questions are answered, because it grows in that light of the self. Self-realization has to be realized, it is not just a state of no questions and no problems and we will get there, when we get there.

If we are cut of the source, there seem to be the Patanjali Sutras, but as technique. Patanjali's real teaching gets lost in that technique and as it is all secret, they cannot inquire and find in Patanjali the knowledge he is really teaching, the Veda as we know it.

It went on the wrong level, that is Tamas, without noticing it. The 'soulmate' was no soulmate, he used it to get people into TM, like a trap. We planned the TTC together, but he didn't care enough to tell me that it should be in French, today he would have liked it to be different, but now it is too late. That was the highest, after because it was all hidden and secret, it got lost and the highest was with the Maharishi who was not there and the leader, who was just an actor. It was all upside down, nothing was as is should, it was all Tamas, no Sathva.

With Baba I told him about it, because I had the opportunity to talk to him, hoping he would be able to tell me why and he said, that is very difficult to understand, just think about God, TM is not the right path. I had to get aware of it in the inner view. 

We can again focus on the light of the higher self.  

Mantra means that which saves, when meditated upon. The Name of God, any one of His countless ones, can serve the purpose.

We used with TM root mantras, but we didn't know the meaning. It was said that it was only about sound and used as a vehicle and just mentally repeated. And they said that there was a difference between the OM and the TM root mantras and Baba said, 'all mantras are okay'. Also the root mantras are related to divinity, it is not just sound. 

If we dial the OM we have divinity at the phone. 

To make a difference between mantras, that felt like, we don't know, we are not the specialists, we just teach a technique, let the mantras be the business of the yogis. As everything was secret anyhow, the power of knowledge was kept with some people in the background, nobody knew who it was, as the master was not there and nothing was transparent, people were working with technique and teaching technique. 

Behind was the tradition of masters and Patanjali, highest knowledge they call it, put around into Tamas. Highest knowledge is sathvic, not tamasic. It is all secret and structured in programs, that means it is not possible to go beyond it and to inquire freely and to get answers in the inner view. We don't get answers if we are forced to stay with a program, it cuts off from the higher self, it has to be free to get answers. It is not possible to really go beyond, even thought with the meditation technique they teach how to go beyond, the program takes care that we don't go beyond. 

It was my inner self reflecting on that level of truth and telling me, all wrong, cut off. 

It was like coming from the outside and no part of me. It was difficult to understand. 

TM seen in the view of health was not harmless and doing only good, as they claim it to be, it was on health level a catastrophe. It made dependent and it separated insight and feelings and that are usually signs of mental sickness. 

There was only one answer for it, everything just stress - insight or not, meditate and all problems will be solved, it is just too simple to be true, it is simple-minded and naive. 

Liberation (Moksha) is not a five-star hotel, or a deluxe tourist home. It is just the awareness of your reality and the rejection of all contrary conceptions. You can recognize your Self quickly and clearly, if you purify your heart with a mantra or by the singing of the glory of God.

It is not done by a technique. In practicing a technique we do not get aware of our reality and by that can reject all contrary conception, there is no such discrimination to be able to reject anything, because we get identified with the technique. 

We are not aware of our own reality, but the technique and the self gets lost.  

You can recognize your Self quickly and clearly, if you purify your heart with a mantra or by the singing of the glory of God. Both will grant you that boon. Sing from the heart, conscious of the layers of meaning that each word has. 

These are the surest ways to have God firmly installed in the throne of your hearts and it will redeem your lives.

This is the main thing that we recognize our own self as different from all contrary conceptions, but that is not possible if the source gets lost, because the source is our own self. If the source gets lost, the reason for it, we don't know anymore why problems and why discrimination and we think there are no problems, just meditate, but not because the problems are not there, but we cannot identify them, we are lost, because we cannot understand the source anymore. 

If we sing from the heart, often we are not aware of the meaning of each word, because we sing in Sanskrit. 

But with time we develop a feeling for it. And we have to be alert and careful about our own mind and how tricky it is. 

Have God firmly installed in the throne of your hearts and it will redeem your lives.