The Gita offers valuable advice to help one swim across the sea of sorrow. Bear no ill-will against any living being (Adweshta Sarva Bhoothaanaam), always be engaged in promoting the wellbeing of all (Sarva Bhootha Hithe Rathaah), and consider foe and friend alike (Samah Shathrou Cha Mithre Cha) - these are jewels contained in the Gita, highlighting the means to develop Universal Love. By declaring that none should have ill feeling towards the entire world of living beings, the Gita is teaching an invaluable lesson that the Divine is in all beings and objects, as an active illumining Principle, appropriately called Atma. The Vedic assertions also firmly establish this profound Truth. All are enveloped in God (Ishaavasyamidham Sarvam); the inner core of all beings is He (Sarva Bhootha antharaatma).
Baba (thought for the day)
We want to swim across the sea of sorrow. I felt that turned off and fed up of my mother's attitude which could see only faults and was constantly telling us, 'you could never do that' and she meant running around like she did, what nobody wanted to do like her. I was fed up. I didn't understand it; I didn't feel comfortable in it and no more at home. It was a strange feeling to go home and to feel always I do not feel home. It felt to me like, whatever I said, it was not approved, but wrong and criticized.
I didn't know why and with whom to find faults and what had happened. And in the ashram it was in the air that he, the neighbor, who had a village consciousness, was responsible. What to do? Or better good to know. As I had listened to my family telling me for many years, 'what do you have, there is nothing'. They were making fun of it that there should be something and nobody cared if it hurt my feelings. It was kind of good to get the confirmation that something was wrong and it was not nothing. When it was in the air in the ashram, it was already twenty years ago and since that happened with the neighbor it was like my parents were gone, they felt rather like monsters, but not like parents and wanted actually to leave and I would have liked to never come back, that would have been my wish, but that didn't work also.
As soon as I came home, I wanted to leave again and I didn't know why it was in the constellation, I felt disturbed by the silent manipulating attitude of the neighbor in the background. He was influencing the situation such that I had to feel it and my family ignored it and said that there was nothing.
After it was in Baba's ashram in the air that he was responsible, it was clear. My families attitude avoided it already for years in such a way that I didn't know any more if I was right or wrong. They talked me constantly out of it, making fun of it, while the other took care of it that it was not okay. Why he did that, the only answer I got was that he had a village consciousness and what is a village consciousness?
As we had been in a relationship for about eighteen months, at that time everybody of that family went in and out our house, his younger brothers also. It was not a real relationship; we just went for walks and had fun. And when he left the relationship was not really ended. He said that there was another one and that we could stay friends and I didn't see him anymore.
There was no way to talk, to tell how it felt to me and as he said we could stay friends, I thought it was all okay and only afterwards I got aware of it that it was not okay.
He was no friend. He turned into an enemy and made me feel it and my family refused to look at it and that created nothing but troubles.
For them it was my mistake and I should not, nobody wanted to see the manipulation and that he controlled the situation. They were not ready to look at the background and why it felt like that. It was real strange to me.
I didn't know why and not what I could do about it and my family was not present. That didn't exist. But actually once I mentioned it to my younger brother and he made fun of it and I wrote back that there had never been anything in the neighborhood, why should there have been a problem? It was only my problem, even if the father had messed up with a neighbor girl, but it was only my problem and I got the answer that he will kill me if I write something like that again.
The energy was such that it was actually that exaggerated, we can see that there is not no problem and that just said that there was no problem, because they didn't go into it.
I had no idea why my family reacted like that disturbed and avoiding it.
But I didn't see him anymore, but as he had said we could stay friends, I thought there was no problem. Until it was clear beyond doubt that he had no intention to stay friends and he began to make us feel it.
First I believed it that we would stay friends and afterwards I realized that I had been misled by him into thinking everything was fine, but it was not, that was the manipulation in the background. It felt very strange to me the way he tried to put with me my family in question. I had nothing done to him; he had no reason to react like that. The parents didn't want to see that it happened because of their problems and that it had to do with the family story. As is seems my mother was totally gone now, going into self-defense telling you should not, not seeing their own mistakes, but putting the mistake on us, walking around with blinders.
He stayed in the neighborhood, that began to haunt my dreams with nightmares and my family was laughing about it. I tried to remember my childhood and the time in the past when I was a child and I was running around and went to school, but even that felt so far away, I couldn't remember my own childhood anymore, that disturbed it felt. After I realized in Oregon that it was all different than I thought it was and not the right answer and that he was still responsible, I wrote him and that was the first time I told how it felt and I just wrote it down. I didn't care at all anymore what they would think and if they would like it or not, it was too far gone and I had to change it. After that first letter I wrote I felt like relieved and I noticed the childhood came back, I began to feel normal again. So I went on questioning it. After the second letter I got a short note back when he accused me of a disturbing maneuver and I wrote him back, if he would not have started with that disturbance there would be no reason to react, so it was his disturbance created by him and not by me.
But it didn't change. Once it went shopping and met them and they just stared a hole at me, he looked at me and treated me the way that I felt like a small child or like air, first I thought that it was kind of funny, but later no more. I tried to laugh about it, only it didn't work.
And I tried to ignore it like all others as everybody said there is nothing, what do you have?
But the family harmony and the family feeling was gone, because there was never nothing and I just had been let down by them, they were not even looking at it.
That means it got not better, but worse and not better and in the end he sat exactly in the house opposite to my parent's house and in the dream it was as 'manipulation only'.
After all I knew that he was responsible, it was Baba who had said it and that it was manipulation only. I began to attack. I asked him to stop it and that he is responsible and I hold him that I will make him accountable for it. Before I got in that relationship with my ex who took only advantage of it, I had called that guy and asked him why he was in my dream telling me he would come back and get married when he was already married all his life? He didn't get into it and I went on with my ex, who somehow mirrored that situation, but he took only advantage of it. So there was a big difference between what I thought it was and what it really was and why that guy could only take advantage of it.
I had to face that manipulation and why he did it and it also came up with Baba dreams.
Once after I wrote him I was sitting in the front driving the car with Baba in the backseat.
Usually I didn't get an answer, he ignored it, but the pressure was still felt and once it took over a year until he was in my dream again. And every time he was in my dream, I wrote him that he should stop it.
Who ignored me with his wife together openly, but who lived opposite of the road. So what they made fun of and called nothing, was for me that awful, it feels like a concentration camp.
I began to look for truth; it included everything, why it didn't feel alright and why I was looking for it.
After I had looked all over for the self-realization feeling I couldn't find anymore, I began to read books of masters and yogis and got to the conclusion that it had to be practiced.
Bear no ill-will against any living being (Adweshta Sarva Bhoothaanaam), always be engaged in promoting the wellbeing of all (Sarva Bhootha Hithe Rathaah), and consider foe and friend alike (Samah Shathrou Cha Mithre Cha) - these are jewels contained in the Gita, highlighting the means to develop Universal Love.
The inner master helped me to treat foe and friend alike. From time to time he was in the dream again; it was the pratibimba the reflection of the object, the situation as it had happened years ago. Every time there was that reflection, I wrote him to leave me alone. I knew it was only a reflection, but if things would have been okay, it would not have been an issue. There was a reason why that reflection was there and once it was about two years later he was there again and I wrote him again, about the subject of the dream and the conclusion.
I thought it would never end and I was tired of it. I didn't know what I was doing, I just had to follow the inner master and nobody else knew what I was doing. But like that the whole issue came up. I followed the master and I told him that I followed the master and I didn't know when I was actually fighting to the end. But I knew when it was the end. It was when I got the news that he had suddenly died. That came by surprise. It was the last thing I expected, he was only 57 years old and it is already ten years ago. As it seems he was mowing the grass and probably he had a heart attack. It was my mother who told me that he died and she called me and when talking about it sometime later the precipice was in the air that had to do with pride. So that guy has hurt her pride or her pride made it impossible for her to see his manipulation.
I couldn't believe it that it was gone that problem, but the inner master said, 'harm set, harm get', it was bad, it was not funny. It had created innumerable problems in the family, I never felt at home anymore at that place and I actually went to Baba to find the truth and truth is, that my other was attached and therefore, she avoided it and I had been let down by them.
They never looked at the situation and how it really had been.
But with that guy who my mother projected some romantically inclined into it is also the feeling of concentration camp in the air. That has nothing to do with romance and I wondered where she lived, when I noticed her expectation and saw how it really was. It is difficult to see such a naïve state of mind and to see it as mother. She tried to achieve the unachievable and she was that attached to her idea that she told us that we would never be able to do that. To get a feeling for that attachment is also difficult. If we know we cannot achieve it, we don't think about it and to even be attached at that idea, what was for her a kind of mission, that is beyond all common sense and maybe that fits in the 'insight' of naïve and dangerous.
By declaring that none should have ill feeling towards the entire world of living beings, the Gita is teaching an invaluable lesson that the Divine is in all beings and objects, as an active illumining Principle, appropriately called Atma. The Vedic assertions also firmly establish this profound Truth. All are enveloped in God (Ishaavasyamidham Sarvam); the inner core of all beings is He (Sarva Bhootha antharaatma).
We don't need to feel ill if we follow the inner master, but he makes it come up. And why does it happen, because every object has its reflection, the pratibimba. If someone is a hypocrite and a liar and we don't know and we see only God in that person, it will come back as liar in the reflection.
My ex talked about being 'husband', but the reflection of the 'husband', that is divinity and heart level, was never present. But there was Baba with vampire teeth and second Baba with a long nose, that was the reflection and it was not joyful getting aware of it. He was a liar and he pretended to have everything and no problems and it was the opposite and he was only taking advantage of it. I thought I followed the master and went in that relationship and Baba said, follow the master, fight to the end, and finish the game. I had to fight to the end and that was when Baba was in his dream and told him that I had to go to him to make peace with him.
You can imagine how he began to abuse and ridicule asking me who was that stupid that he had to do to Baba to make peace with him. He thought that I was in a war game with Sai Baba, instead of seeing the mirror of his dream, that he called me back to him, because with my ex was no peace.
For me it was shocking to get aware of that state of mind.
Finishing the game is only now, getting aware of it.
And he had no idea of it until now he has no notion about it, he had one more dream and in that dream Baba said to me in his dream that I should go back to my lovely husband. But that is only possible if there is a lovely husband and that guy was really expecting Baba to send us back to him, even though he had never been present as husband, it was no heart level. Instead of husband Baba was in the insight as 'Baba vampire', because I went with him in that relationship.
That was a tough lesson.
There was one more dream or 'insight'. Insights are either Baba dreams or the refection of the object, the Pratibimba, the reflection is replicating exactly what is there, we also know it as Darshan, sight of truth. In that sense the 'Darshan' of my ex was that he was standing in a ruin and he was wearing a red woman skirt and a black fur woman jacket and he said that is all I could get in garage sales. It was the image of the reality that he took only advantage of it.
Baba said when he left the body that he took only advantage of it and that ruin and the way he was dressed and the way he spoke and nothing left but ruin, that is the result of only taking advantage of it.
Knowledge, courage, volition, silence.
Knowledge is the insight 'I am That', Tat Twam Asi, the universal truth, we can get aware of the ocean, is divinity or Atman and the individual beings are the waves in the ocean and if we see it like that, there is no difference between all beings.
That is our knowledge and we need to have the courage to face it, to see unity in diversity and the volition is to see it in our own life, no matter what obstacles are there, that is what Baba calls Tapas, spiritual work. What about silence? Only in silence the voice of God can be heard, we need silence of the mind to get to the right insights and to be able to hear the voice of God in our heart.
If we reflect and talk about the thought for the day, it is about Baba's words and the truth in his words, we need to listen, to think it over and to absorb to be able to get the knowledge. If we do not see it in our own life, we cannot understand it. It is like in the air or cut off if we do not see it in our own life and by seeing it in our own life the knowledge and 'insight' grows.
But that is also him, he said he is the 'insight' and he is the following 'step'. So when it was about my ex the 'insight' of the ruin, what I thought at that time yet that it was only a dream, a strange dream, but nevertheless a dream, has a different value when it is 'insight', because he is the insight and the following step listening to his words and he is telling us that we should take care of the house of the watchman, that is also He and in that light we understand 'ruin', as not taking good care of it, not only careless, but it is ruined.
That is how insights and the following step make sense and we begin to understand it.
And that guy was expecting us to be sent back to him because he looked at himself as lovely husband and he even told us that 'divorce' was not possible and he ignored it until we were in Baba's presence, there he signed it.
He never cared about the child, he never cared about us, but divorce was not possible.
He wanted to come and open a money box here, not to see his family. It is perverted and upside down and he doesn't have any idea who Sai Baba really is.
He does the opposite of it, lives in the clouds, in a dream world and expects Baba after all to send us back to the lovely husband, he never was.
It feels like he has no idea what he is doing and he went there because he walked in the footsteps of his former boss, a wealthy American and he was never focused on divinity, but only on money and that is probably the reason why it is that perverted.
Even today if he goes to Prasanthi, he is the guy who went there with his big friend or ex-boss that is his image and he makes holidays, it is a beautiful place and he just goes there to relax, to feel good, to take advantage of it, but not in the purpose of self-realization.
He just goes on walking in the footsteps of his boss, he just mixed Baba and the boss and as it seems he cannot separate it and money and business and Baba is all the same, even if it turns into a sacrilege as Baba said yesterday.
There is no such thing as business of business and business of life being the same.
There is no business of life. TM made business our of it and it is all mind only and therefore, they will get there in the future, it is not Atman and no real meditation.
There is the 'I am that' and that has nothing to do with 'business', we cannot call it business of spirituality or life. It leads to the insight of 'I am the One' and we cannot call it business of oneness …, because it is only 'insight' and highest truth and we don't get any exchange for it, not even a thank you.
We should be more careful about truth and not put everything on the level of business.
Business is in the mind.
'I am that' and 'I am the One' is Atman and highest truth and beyond the mind, it is Baba and not business, he has never said that he is a business man.
Knowledge, Courage, Volition, Silence is Tapas, spiritual work and it leads to 'insights', it is no business.
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