Self-Realization

Co-operation among individuals grouped as a society guarantees security and stability. It is called, Shri Rama Raksha (protection), the mark of Divine Grace. The surest sign of awareness of one’s Divine Nature is the recognition of the bond of kinship with other beings. This bond has now snapped, and as a result, life has been rendered meaningless. The evil spirits of greed and pride, of envy and hatred, are executing their demonic dance in the hearts of man.

People are not able to appreciate the value of the air they breathe, of the Sun's rays that illumine the world, the drops of rain that sustain life, and the subtle power that underlies every object in Nature. They have become low-minded people, dedicating their lives to meaningless pursuits. What needs to be done today is to foster people who are determined to stand and even suffer to realize the holy goals of peace and prosperity for the entire world.

Baba (thought for the day)

We get great news that Baba will come again if we pray for him that is what we get by email and we read it in the Internet. He will take soon a body again if we pray for him to come. 

Baba never left, he dropped the body and it fell into dust, he is always around us, it was always the question why we cannot experience it.

It was a surprise after six months of staying with him in the ashram and there was nothing but love and the universe seemed to be made out of love only and coming back, where did that love go? I was convinced that it was true, it was universal love, only here we didn’t feel it.

I wondered how that reality could be true in his presence of only love and as soon as I was back it was gone, but I went on with my meditation, because it should be possible with meditation to stay in that universal love, shouldn’t it?

But in my meditation I was alone and Baba is sharing it with others, only we have to know how to share and it is different from socializing and I guess there is the biggest problem if we cannot feel that love all around us.

If I get aware of love in a person at work I still get nervous. At work I like more distance and a clear head and being focused on my work and I don’t like it that much to get aware of love. It feels like getting to close to people, even if I know it is the universe and there is only love, I try to stay in my own self and to not express it, only in a silent joy to not be kind of embarrassing in an outburst of emotions. There is love and I noticed that it is only possible with sincerity.

Only once I got kind of taken away and I enjoyed that feeling of love myself and it felt like the other side went into distance on the spot. I am feeling the love, but I am not enjoying it.

That was the level of my ex, he said always that he was enjoying it and at that time I didn’t realize when it was taking advantage of it and when it is joy.

The feeling of joy and taking advantage of it and enjoying it is not the same. The joy is just a feeling coming out of the heart, enjoying it is the ego and feeling good in it.

So usually I stay very sincere, because it is delicate and we should not go into enjoying it, but stay with the silent feeling of joy.

My ex also said always that he was enjoying his little daughter and it felt kind awkward, but I didn’t know what it was exactly. Today I know after we went to Baba and he said that it was ‘perverted’ and that he took only advantage of it, we begin to realize what level of enjoyment and pleasure it was when he said he was enjoying her, but he never was taking care of any problem and always screamed out loud my name, and if there was something usually he made me responsible for it. 

He knew always the answer as it should be and not the state of reality as it really was, he was living in his head only focused on enjoying it and not centered in the love of the heart. There was no feeling of love in his presence and what he was enjoying was not the same as feeling joy. He was taking advantage of it and that is why it felt awkward when he said he was enjoying his little daughter. It is not the same when we feel love and joy because it is universal love. That is a different level of joy than enjoying it.

The surest sign of awareness of one’s Divine Nature is the recognition of the bond of kinship with other beings. This bond has now snapped, and as a result, life has been rendered meaningless. The evil spirits of greed and pride, of envy and hatred, are executing their demonic dance in the hearts of man.

So we can enjoy knowing that he will come again in the body in the future, but the real joy is feeling his presence and that was there when he was as guest in our center not long ago, guest is God. That is the type of joy that is real. 

I am glad to know that our Indian devotees are able to live that level and they are aware of it that guest is God.

The Westerners prefer to think that they should pray that he will come again in his body to enjoy it when he is in the body again. That is divinity projected in the future and lived on a body level, but we will probably see and hear all different ways of it.

If Baba is the divine Atman and that is always present, he is still here and he always has been here.  

As Baba tells us in that thought for the day, we also get aware the reality around us that the bond has snapped and that life has been rendered meaningless. 

We can enjoy and share the thought that he is coming again, but we also should think about it that we have experienced with our own family and how it snapped and how life was rendered meaningless. I remember well the feeling and the shock to realize that the meaning was gone. Thinking over Baba’s words gives us the feeling and understanding for it why it felt meaningless.

What was it? It was the demonic dance in the hearts of man. It was also that demonic dance in the heart of my ex who let him enjoy his daughter instead of caring for her and keeping in loving touch with her.

Instead of all that talk that he will come again, we know that he will come again, he said that he will born again as Prema Sai, so that are now news. We knew it always when we went to see Baba that he had been Shirdi Baba and that he will be again Prema Sai.

But what is new for us is to get aware of the demonic dance in the hearts of man that is of more importance to us than to get confirmed again and again that he will come back.

The evil spirits of greed and pride, of envy and hatred, are executing their demonic dance in the hearts of man.

People are not able to appreciate the value of the air they breathe, of the Sun's rays that illumine the world, the drops of rain that sustain life, and the subtle power that underlies every object in Nature. They have become low-minded people, dedicating their lives to meaningless pursuits.

If we are able to appreciate the value of the air we breathe and the sun’s rays that illumine the world, we live in the present, that is important to find him in our own self, in our own divine nature. We can enjoy seeing forward that he will come again, but that we knew always. 

We should know the difference between low-minded people and dedicating life to meaningless pursuits and have enough discrimination to know why it had been like that and what made it like that.

What needs to be done today is to foster people who are determined to stand and even suffer to realize the holy goals of peace and prosperity for the entire world.

If we find in our own family that demonic dance of in the heart of man, how do we deal with it and how get out of it not broken hearted but okay? 

That is the transformation that has to happen in our mind. We should see it and get aware of it and know why there was that feeling that it was meaningless, everything around us went on like sunny and beautiful and full of flowers and why it felt that awkward. If we are able to see it in our own life, we get aware of it on a different level than when we read only words and we think, yes, Baba is talking about demonic dance in the heart of man, but not in my life … therefore, everything is fine. That is not true and not a right conclusion, there was a reason why we went to see him and it shows that there was some problem in the background, otherwise, if everything would have been okay we would not have to gone to him as he is around us always.

It was all upside down, didn't make sense and it was meaningless and he tells us why. 

When I went back to Baba he said that it is 'perverted', that was the relationship with my ex and after a long time writing and thinking it over only now I get able to look at that perversion more closely. 

If the inner master tells in the ‘insight’ that it is perversion, how do we understand it? 

We have to listen to his words and thinking it over to get aware of it, because he tells us it is perversion and if we don't see it in our own life, as these are his words, we cannot understand it right if we do not listen, think it over and absorb.

And Maharishi was in my dream, we sat in a restaurant and ate tuna and he said, ‘it is incredible that we sit here and eat meat just to forget that we are vegetarian and different from the others’.

It tells me why he made TM like he did, to not be different from the others, even if we meditated; it was still possible to think that we are like the others. 

If we are different and we are if we had to go to India and sing Bhajans, we can maybe forget it, but the others cannot. We want to just live our lives, but the others do not let us. What the others think is the mind.

I guess the revenge of the brother was like that, because we are different, even if he did TM once and before mother's death he said that I should take care that the family goes along. 

If they would get along there would have no need to tell that. Why would she have said it if they would get along? I had to question it as it was the mother and mother is God, but it was no joy, it was just getting aware of the demonic play in the heart of man.

If he thinks he needs to get into revenge and tell me that he will rather murder me if I would write something like that again … and it was about mother’s words, so the inner master said, that he is not interested in my message … luckily, because I wouldn’t like to go along on that path, we never know how far he is able to go if he does the worst he can do, even if we should not take it that serious, it is still the worst he can do.

But he did TM before and he does the worst he can do. 

After I had to drive with the old mother for a visit, he was in the hospital, and in the dream it said that my brother does the worst he can do, it was just ‘insight’ and at that time it was not yet clear what that worst was, now we know and that is how we get aware of the meaning in Baba’s words when he talks about the demonic play in the heart of man.

He said to the sister that it is revenge and she told he that he should not do it, that we do not talk like that with anyone and for sure not with family, but he did it anyhow, he got rid of some kind of frustration or madness or I don’t know what it was, but it feels evil.

My mother said I should take care that the family gets along and he did the opposite, he used the worst words he is able to use. It was the mother’s wish and words, but as it was her, she brought up something awful. 

More I get into it and more I am thinking it over, there is a certain point it is that bad we cannot take it serious anymore, but I guess that is just a feeling of avoiding it. 

The inner master would not have mentioned it if it would not be the demonic play in the heart of man.
When my sister talked to me about it, I told her that it was my mother’s problem and not mine to take care that a family does get along and if she did it or didn’t do it, whatever it is, it is not my problem, as he said in the inner view, he is not interested in my message.

Baba is the insight and the following step, so the following step that he is not interested in my message and every effort in that direction feels not only awkward and sick and a waste of time, but also energy waste, we can use it for something better.

But it is about identification, we have to know to whom we belong and that is not the right type of brotherhood, if Baba talks about brother it is the level of devotion. 

From the insight of a non-functional family we get to the insight of ‘perversion’ and that explains maybe a bit more why it can be that upside down that the meaning feels like lost.
Important is our inner transformation. The pain is not there, the family is an example of the demonic play in the heart of man, that is how we get a feeling for Baba’s words and that makes a difference in our life. 

He is living abroad now, I don’t know his address and I am not interested in knowing it. He was always on the level when it got too bad. 

The emotions coming up when someone of our own family is talking like that, that was kind of scary. It is bringing the worst up in us and not the best. 

It felt like they all reacted against the word of the mother, it was not possible to talk about it, too much emotions coming up. 

So family includes also the worst we can do or it is perverted, anyhow we cannot change it. But it is certainly not my mission to save them, it is more a matter of getting aware that we do not belong to that level really, it is all mind and that our real family is not on that level. 

After Baba left the body they said that ‘our message has begun’. So, whatever that was, in the insight it said, no interest in your message, it tell us that we are on the wrong level. No use to talk about it, he is not interested in our message. 

That is also our safety, if a brother talks about murder, he is for sure no brother, it feels like he is by mistake born in that family or he is ‘perverted’, the result of the parents. They lived in Spain and they had often some troubles. But once there was some problem between them and I could see how she got more upset and in the end we were wrong, instead of telling him, she blamed us. I was there after I had been with Baba for six months. They lived in Spain. I went for some weeks, before I left again. In the end his doing was projected on us. 

The father was mad at me and said that he is not driving me to the bus. I couldn’t sleep that night properly and in the dream was the ‘insight’ that they are responsible for the state of mind of my younger brother, so that is the result. I was in a projection role of the mother, the revenge was for the mother not for me. I don't feel it is the right address and I don't need to accept that letter anymore. If we know it is about wrong identification and mind, we can let go of it. 

I just hope he feels better, but for me it is done. 

Follow the master, fight to the end and finish the game. When it said in the insight that he is not interested in my message, it was the end of that fight and finishing the game is now getting aware of it.  

There was a moment I was really scared of it and I didn’t know how to answer, because it is always possible that someone has lost his mind. 

Going in direction of divinity and truth and peace, whatever that was … to get killed for it, is not exactly what we expect. Baba said in the insight that he does the worst he can do and also why he is like that. And he said to take care of my brother, but that is not the brother he was talking about, he talked about the devotee, devotion is brother.

The surest sign of awareness of one’s Divine Nature is the recognition of the bond of kinship with other beings. This bond has now snapped, and as a result, life has been rendered meaningless. The evil spirits of greed and pride, of envy and hatred, are executing their demonic dance in the hearts of man.
In a thought for the day not long ago he called it dichotomy, that splitting between teaching and putting it into practice; I could hardly bear to feel it here in the air always. It is even worse, we do not get recognized for what it is, because we look like not part of the whole but different from it. 

It is no problem, but it is still there, we do not do it and it is still present and in thinking about the thought for the day I somehow got over it, I don’t know how, probably in getting aware of it every day new again or in getting used to it.

People are not able to appreciate the value of the air they breathe, of the Sun's rays that illumine the world, the drops of rain that sustain life, and the subtle power that underlies every object in Nature. They have become low-minded people, dedicating their lives to meaningless pursuits.

They put either their whole family in it or nothing and I cannot do that, I have no family to put it, but I have a spiritual perverted family and we do not know how to live with it. And the daughter is the one who will suffer, what is created by that dichotomy and the Western reality and the perversion. 

That is what Baba said, when she was lost in the mud and his voice asked in the background and what now? I was still able to get out of that hole, but if I tried to help her I was lost in the mud as well. 

So behind that image of that ‘mud hole’ was Baba’s voice, the child lost in the mud and he asked, what now? There was no answer, only a question left.