Worse than a Beast

 

 

When the mind of a person is unattached to the ups and downs of life, but is able to maintain equanimity under all circumstances, then even physical health can be assured. The mental firmament must be like the sky, which bears no mark of the passage through it of birds or planes or clouds. Illness is caused more by malnutrition of the mind than of the body. Doctors speak of vitamin deficiency; I will call it the deficiency of Vitamin G, and I will recommend the repetition of the Name of God, with accompanying contemplation of the glory and grace of God. This Vitamin G is the medicine that is needed. Regulated life and habits are two-thirds of the treatment, while the medicine is just one-third. You must reveal the divine qualities of love, humility, detachment and contentment. Else, you could become worse than a beast and in fact more deadly.

 

That was the insight with TM, it was bright sunshine and the air was breaking into pieces and that was the man coming in our dreams to awake us.

We solved all problems with TM and were focused on 'always going on and on' and it felt like undisturbed, beautiful sunshine and then the air was breaking into pieces and it was like transparent glass in the air as air cannot break into pieces, but something was not quite right that was  in the dream and at that time I had no idea that it was him and that he comes in our dreams to awake us, but it was a wake-up call for sure, only it was not so nice on that background of beautiful sunshine only pieces left, there was still beauty in the air, but it didn't feel good, but when he came in the dream to wake us up it was already done and final, I just didn't realize it yet.

Baba said in his thought for the day if peace and right action get separated only pieces are left. That was the answer in his words and the confirmation of the insight; it tells us why there were only pieces left. As he is the knower and only he knows, I had no idea what had happened and on the mind level there was no way to get the right answer, I had to listen to him to get the right answer. He is the knower and I had tried about everything to get an answer and it was in vain as it was in the mind only.

There was no right action and peace were separated and the man who comes in our dream to awake us was again in the dream and they were all puppets on a string and the hand who had made the puppets was not present. There was dependence between the hand and the puppets and it makes us aware that if we learn everything by heart and we do it mechanically like with TM, we get like puppets on a string, he was dictating every step actually and there was some not right action to get that insight that right action and peace are separated. 

As we know from listening to Swami's words the human values are not independent and only pieces left something had to be wrong. 

If we want to make the experience of pure love, we need three things, right action, peace and truth and if right action and peace are separated only pieces are left. That was not great. 

It tells us also that before right action and peace had been put together and that was during the TTC teacher's training, we listened non-stop to tapes explaining the wisdom on the level of science and scientific research and that is based on truth, we had to accept truth and then we had to accept right action and that was purification of the mind is necessary, we need to meditate and there is not only our mind, but all minds and right action was the TM-teacher, getting others also into meditation to purify the mind and get into a state of sathva. If there is no sathva, we cannot listen to his truth, because only Sathva knows truth.

In Swami's ashram is always Sathva, we don't need to meditate to get there, but when he is not in the ashram there is no Sathva and therefore, people have that much troubles to listen, think it over and absorb. Only Sathva knows the truth, if we live our normal live in Rajas, we cannot listen to his words. In the ashram the sathva level is kept with Veda chanting and Bhajans going on regularly.  

The man who comes in our dream to awake us was afterwards present again and now all turned into enemies. We know with the first insight that right action and peace were separated, we know from our own experience that they had been put together first in the teacher's training, we know that he is the doer and that we cannot understand the Atma level with the mind, that means it was not possible to understand those insights, due to not right action, it was still the same reason, but now it was about the result and that is not funny at all, there were only pieces left, when people are puppets on a string they are blind and don't really know what they are doing and the hand was not there, somehow something went wrong in the leader level and the man coming in our dreams to awake us showed that it had turned into hell. 

During an assembly in Italy in the presence of the Maharishi it had been heaven on earth. It was no more, it had turned into the opposite and that was kind of a shock and not knowing what it was and no means of getting right answers. The man who comes in our dreams to awake us was again there and this time it was a black hole in my meditation and that was so scary, it was on three levels, the black hole is a replacement partner, the master was not there, it was projected in the leader and there were the three basic fears, fear because of the relationship not present, black hole and trust lost, because it looked like that, no answers possible in a black hole, no master present going beyond the mind and the fear to lose the mind, to get sick and the fear of death, body level, it was the fear of dying of tiredness. That was no more funny and it was the man who comes in our dream to awake us, but it also shows that on that level we don't get the right answers.

I went on with TM mediation and hoped it would get okay again and that was not possible, I hoped it would go on still because I had to find a better way and I didn't know that it was the man coming in our dream to awake us and if it is about awakening we have to go for it no matter what, our life will change if we like it or if we are ready for it or not.

In that sense it got only worse with the fear coming up and the lost trust and in the end it felt that scared that I was putting Omsairam in front of my TM-mantra and I had totally lost trust in it and I realized I hardly knew anything about it, it was all secret really and we didn't know about mantras and Patanjali and we just trusted and did programs and for some reason it didn't work out. 

In the meantime my whole life was based on TM and I went with the leader to the Maharishi hoping to find a better answer and it was even worse, above him in the air was criminal, but that was more like Darshan, it was standing in the air above his head and he saw it as well, he was aware of it and Nandkishore his right hand saw it as well. After all those those years in between I realize now the shock that really was, because I thought it was okay and I was convinced of it. It was a very scary experience.

Today we understand it. 

It was not possible to get answers on the insight level as it was all only science and no master behind it, he is the knower and with TM we didn't get the truth, it was all summarized in meditate and all problems will be solved, that is why puppets on a string, totally dependent on someone holding the string and if that was not there, it couldn't work. I went on with meditation, but it was a total shock really because I had liked it that much, but nevertheless if there is no master we can listen to and see our own insights in his words and trying by listening to his words to find the right answer, we don't get an answer, because he is the knower, on the Atma level we cannot understand it with the mind and the human values and how they work together is Atma level and not our mind.

I went on with meditation to keep up the systematic Sadhana and the rest had to be understood somehow. It didn't normalize again, but the experiences with TM were nevertheless exceptional and the background of only sunshine was also part of the insight and if there is only sunshine we are unattached to the up and downs of life and it felt like equanimity also at the beginning in Baba's presence, but after he said that it is not the right path and that I should only think about God and I had the feeling of not understanding anything anymore it was gone and the up and downs began again. 

Perfect health was also part of the TM meditation and knowing we could sit down and meditate and solve our problems.  

When the mind of a person is unattached to the ups and downs of life, but is able to maintain equanimity under all circumstances, then even physical health can be assured. The mental firmament must be like the sky, which bears no mark of the passage through it of birds or planes or clouds.

That was the basic insight, the sunshine environment and no clouds and it was breaking into pieces and we know from Swami's words that there are only pieces left if we separate right action and peace.

Illness is caused more by malnutrition of the mind than of the body. Doctors speak of vitamin deficiency; I will call it the deficiency of Vitamin G, and I will recommend the repetition of the Name of God, with accompanying contemplation of the glory and grace of God. This Vitamin G is the medicine that is needed.

We meditated at lot, we had our Siddhis program in the morning and all together it were about three hours or more and we had it in the evening and we had every day center activity and that is the same feeling we get when doing Swami's work, but we have to do it first to get aware of it. If we don't do it we don't get aware of it, we realize it by doing; he is only present if we do it.

Regulated life and habits are two-thirds of the treatment, while the medicine is just one-third. You must reveal the divine qualities of love, humility, detachment and contentment. Else, you could become worse than a beast and in fact more deadly.

That is what we did, we had regulated life habits, we meditated at the same time and the focus was on spiritual activity, it was a total shock that it all was breaking into pieces, I was also not ready for that, who expected that. I don't know why I had that feeling that I didn't understand anything anymore, when before it was even something like equanimity. It was such a shock, I just couldn't find the right answers and what had happened on the mind level and with TM it was not possible to get answers. With Swami I didn't know yet how to do it or I couldn't do it alone, I needed someone to do it and that with Al Drucker also didn't work and there was finally Charles, who only took advantage of it and I guess I have never felt that helpless trying in vain to understand what was wrong because with the mind we cannot understand it. That is why I hoped Charles would help me to find answer when it was the opposite, with him I didn't find any answer anymore.

Else, you could become worse than a beast and in fact more deadly.

That is a warning if we don't live his message and think we know and take only advantage of it, that is the reality I met with Charles, that is the confirmation, we could become worse than a beast, lower, a vampire is worse than a beast and also in fact more deadly.

We should be careful if we listen to Swami's words what we allow the mind to do and what not to not turn into that and we can see it from his words that it is possible to become worse than a beast, a beast is animal level, the demon or vampire is must worse than the animal level and a vampire is deadly, he doesn't stop with sucking our blood until there is nothing left and that is deadly.

We should listen to Swami, he is not talking only about love, that is what all think that he is talking only about love, because they don't listen to him.

This here is a warning and it confirms and explains why we had dreams of Swami with a vampire face and a very long nose. It confirms the nightmare and the constant feeling of danger in the air living with him together in the US; it confirms that if we don't listen to him, it is possible to become worse than a beast and in fact more deadly.

That is a warning and we should listen to his words and not hear only love, when he doesn't talk about love. The mind always thinks everything is clear and understood, but that is only the mind, if we know the Atma, we also know that we don't know it and that the mind never can know it and therefore, we have to listen to him.

Unity consciousness is if we meditate together and in silence would get aware of Samadhi, all are one in a Samadhi, there is no difference, and everybody in a Samadhi is the same. We share the silence, but in silence we do not get aware of it, it is just pure being.

God consciousness is getting aware of the unity between all people as one that is possible if we sing together and it is like a Samadhi, we transcend not with a mantra in silence repetition in the mind, but we transcend the mind together in singing and getting aware that there is only one voice and only one and if we listen to that unityconsciousness, all are one, we also feel Swami's presence and that is the confirmation of it that it is true, but it is only during singing while we are actually doing it, it is in activity, if we don't do it, we will not feel his presence and it is not true. It is just what we think divinity is, our concept of it and that is not it. It is not the real experience of it. It has to be real to be true and confirmed by his presence. Christina