Mother is God

Mother is not just an ordinary woman; she is verily God. Scriptures give mothers an exalted position in the Universe. Worship her and attain her grace. Once you have the blessings of your mother, you can achieve anything in this world. Never disobey or displease her. Never cause displeasure to your mother. Never hurt her feelings. Then God will help you in all your endeavours. Even today, there is no dearth of noble mothers. They feel pained to see their children straying away from the right path. They leave no stone unturned to correct them. A woman's prayer is more powerful than a thousand prayers of men because women are pure and tender-hearted. Never look down upon women. Treat all elderly women as your mother and the younger ones as your sisters. The world will remain safe and secure only when men have such noble feelings.

It was that ideal of mother is God in holy scriptures or books that got me on that path, at that time years ago it seemed easier to idealize mother than to find faults and to always be pushed back by her way of seeing it and the impossibility of reaching that what had been the mother once in her. As a teenager at a certain point my life went nuts, and I didn't know what it was. I had been in a relationship with a neighbor and everything seemed fine until that was over and no matter what I said, it resulted in explosion and it never got okay again. I went abroad and after coming back, it was never the same gain, my mother or my parent's house were no more a home, it was just disturbing the way I felt and as I didn't like it I began to look for the reason, but it was impossible of talking to them.  

No matter how hard we tried, it was of no use, it was impossible to address the issue in question, the neighborhood felt not okay and if I mentioned it I had to go, because the neighborhood was okay, in her mind, and if it was not, only I was not okay. 

I always excused the mother, finding faults with the father, someone had to be responsible for it until I was with Swami and in the ashram it came up and there was someone else responsible, it was the neighbor. The problem was not the father, but in the mother and the father was in that sense the reflection of the mother and she couldn't handle the neighborhood. 

That was a totally different situation, but before that, years ahead I began to see parents as God because it was much easier to see them as God than finding faults and I never felt really home anymore after I had left the parent's house and by coming back it was kind of gone and I didn't know what it was, that is how I began to look for truth or what I called truth, because before there had been a feeling of self-realization and that seemed gone as well, it was that far away and no more to be found anywhere that it was uncomfortable and it resulted in suffering. When I said that I was looking for truth, it was just another way for calling it self-realization. It was as well abstract and when I said truth, it was still the question, 'what's that?' 

I was watching and I went ahead watching and waiting until it changed from the inside, that was the main issue, it had to come from the inside. 

And I began to find it in meditation as meditation is going inside, by meditating it felt like right action and it helped to stay in touch with the inside. 

And I began to find it with Swami, it was present in the insights, in the dream. He said he is the man coming in our dreams to awaken, that truth reflected in the dreams.

So my mother it was kind of difficult to please, no matter what we did and said, she had always an answer for it, 'you should not', it means whatever the input the reflection of it was not what we had in mind, the reflection was always the same. 

With time I just did my best and forgot about it, there was no way of changing it and one time I had it in the dream as, 'for your mother it is too late, she is too old'. 

But when we see mothers as God, we go ahead, it is easier as we don't find faults. We tried to please her, if it didn't work at least we tried and when we see in mother God, we do it because it is God and that is a different way of motivation. 

We had a difficult neighborhood and there were problems and first of getting aware of it that it had to with the neighborhood that was already a challenge and getting aware that they couldn't handle it, that is still another thing. 

My mother did it the only way she knew how and that was hard work and she got to the conclusion that we could never have done that, the precipice in the air when she talked about the neighborhood is as Swami said a sign of pride, but we have to listen to his words and see it in our own life to get to a right conclusion. 

I saw the precipice in the air, but I didn't think in that moment of Swami, we talked about the neighborhood it was much later that I read the thought for the day and he said, that precipice is pride, to get to the right conclusion that it is pride in the mother when I saw the precipice in the air, that was another challenge. Getting aware of the precipice was the first insight, knowing what it means and getting to a right and not a wrong conclusion was the following step. I could have stayed with that precipice in the air as insight without understanding it and without ever getting aware that it means pride if I wouldn't have listened to Swami's words. 

He is the man coming in our dreams to awaken, but dreams are insights and it is much closer to existence and reality than the outside sense level. 

As Swami said in the insight, he is the insight, that would have been first the 'precipice' and he is the following step, that would have been the following step, getting aware of it why there was a precipice in the air. It was a sign that there was a problem and it was in the mother, it also showed that it was impossible to reach her as there was a precipice, there was no bridge over it and it is a sign of pride. 

It was pride the real reason why it was not possible to talk about it and we got always answers that avoided it, always like, 'you should not', 'what do you have, there is nothing', no matter what, it was appeasing, but as well not important enough to look at it and that was a sign of pride, her pride made it impossible to get the point, therefore, it was impossible to address it properly, it was impossible to bring it to the point and it expanded. 

It is as well Swami telling us if we don't bring it to the point, it will expand. 

But first we have to recognize it as a conflict and when a conflict is omitted or ignored it will expand and it was pride that made her not see it as a conflict, she was working that hard, it was just not possible that there was a conflict. She knew how taking care of it, I should not and that is how we see it in our own life in thinking it over, something that is hardly done and I don't know anyone really who is practicing it and it all happened with meditation and coming from the inside. 

It was Swami in the dream who said, 'use my words' and that is how it began, we cannot use his words if we don't focus on his words and we find his words in the thought for the day and by thinking it over we get aware of it. 

He talks about the universal principle of mother is God, it doesn't mean we have to adore it, we can, but for me it means I have to think it over, contemplation is thinking it over and it makes come up my own mother and my own experience with my mother. Contemplation is not just adoring the principle of motherhood, it is getting inside aware of it. 

Mother is not just an ordinary woman; she is verily God. Scriptures give mothers an exalted position in the Universe. Worship her and attain her grace. Once you have the blessings of your mother, you can achieve anything in this world. Never disobey or displease her. Never cause displeasure to your mother. Never hurt her feelings. Then God will help you in all your endeavours.

But we have another reason in those words why we should please the mother, it is not just getting aware of the exalted position in the universe, what makes the principle of motherhood a universal principle, but in seeing in mother the divine, we should attain her grace, because when we have the blessings of the mother, we can achieve anything in this world. That is important, we should get her blessings. 

We shouldn't displease her and hurt her feelings so that God will help us in our endeavors. If we want to be successful, we should listen to him and do what he is telling us, revere mother as God, but how when there is pride and a precipice. With time I just accepted it and I thought she was right and I was wrong until Swami made me aware of it that it was not right and she was not right and I was not wrong. That was kind of a huge thing getting those insights, it was on the feeling level, I had accepted that I was wrong and I stopped questioning it, it didn't make any sense, but it was as it was, it didn't feel right, but we didn't try to change it, but I was still looking for truth. I never put my mother in question, I just went ahead, there were just no answers. 

 Even today, there is no dearth of noble mothers. They feel pained to see their children straying away from the right path. They leave no stone unturned to correct them. A woman's prayer is more powerful than a thousand prayers of men because women are pure and tender-hearted. Never look down upon women. Treat all elderly women as your mother and the younger ones as your sisters. The world will remain safe and secure only when men have such noble feelings.

Noble thoughts and noble feelings about women is not really what we find in today's world. Women are pure and tender-hearted. 

We had last night a study circle and the discussion was about God is everything as well the mind and it was kind of difficult to get it to the point and it resulted in the difference of a concept and the imagination that he is everything in our understanding what is mind and the direct experience of it. 

When we are talking about it, it is a concept and mind, only direct experience is true and in that sense right. 

There is always one person and she is very active on the practical level, but she makes me rather feel like throwing up. Some time ago she made out of every conflict something she thought she had to deal with and it was a problem not only hers but also the others and that I stopped somehow in telling her that her problem was not my problem as well. 

But she is still putting everything in question and yesterday she said that Swami's words are a big pain and I didn't know what she was talking about, I didn't answer, it was not very truthful and I didn't know how to understand what she said. It was more like making herself interesting. I didn't know what to tell when his words are pain, that is not my experience and when someone is telling us, but his words are giving me pain, I didn't want to tell her it is not true or it cannot be true, what I probably thought about it anyhow, that it was not true, but I am kind of fed up about her conclusions. 

It is not my task to tell her it is not true, but to let it open. 

It is always putting everything in question and there was someone else who said, the mind is also God and I said, no Swami is not telling it is as well God, he tells us that he is not the mind. She insisted on that the mind is as well God and I said no, the mind is the result of wrong identification with the body and it is not true, God is true, the mind is illusion, it is not God. Finally I told her that it was only her imagination and conceptual that is not true, it is the mind and therefore, it has to be direct experience that it is true and not just imagination. 

If I imagine to write like I am doing it now as long as I just think about it, it is not real, it is just imagination, I have to do it,I have to take the time, the decision of doing it and then I have to do it, write it down and by doing it something happens and it becomes real. It is doing it, it is direct experience and not just what we think about it and maybe we will do it sometime in the future, that is not real, that is just the thought of it. 

The issue ended in the difference between direct experience what is present when we are singing and just thinking about it or talking about it and it is conceptual, therefore, it is not direct experience. 

The thought everything is God and that the mind is as well God,  is not right. The mind is the result of illusion, it is the result of identification with the body and God is not identified with the body. 

So then we had the other one again who said, but how can you be so sure and I said lets go back to Swami's words. 

She said the Gopis are only in love and see God everywhere and she used it as example that the Gopis are only heart and I said that the Gopis have more discrimination than anybody else, because to be able to see God everywhere we have to be able to know the difference between the mind and Atma. We are all in the senses and they result in the mind and we have to know that it is not that, to be able to see God everywhere, it has to be direct experience, not just the thought of it. 

That idea that he is everything is common in the West and the result of lots of wrong understanding and getting to a wrong conclusion. 

Swami mentioned in the text that where truth is there is bliss and where bliss is there is God, that is totally opposed to the conceptual understanding that the mind is as well God and it is telling us where bliss is there is God and not the mind. If the mind is there, there is no bliss. 

And I said, when we talk about truth, we have Jnana, wisdom, truth is opposed to untruth and she put that in question as well and it felt like, look at his words, it is written down here in big letters, how big do we have to write it down that you get it? 

It is in font of her eyes and not thought over, she is putting in question what is answered in front of her eyes that when there is truth, there is the difference between untruth and truth and the conclusion, her way of questioning it shows that she doesn't listen. 

After all that finally it ended in talking about mind and conceptual, only direct experience can be true. 

With meditation practice that was easy, we sit down and meditate and that is direct experience and we transcend the mind, when we are back in thoughts we are back in the mind. Therefore, we have that clear difference between no thoughts and pure consciousness and being in thoughts and in activity. We can transcend the mind and then someone else said, but we should meditate all day long and that is not meditation practice like we do it a certain time, but that is discrimination, if we are constantly aware of 'not this, not that' in our mind state, we are kind of practicing it all day long as we go beyond the mind and the result is just pure being, we get aware of the mind as not that, it is the 'neti, neti' practice. 

We talked about all that, but there is one person and I don't like her way of switching it around, but after all it was not that bad as we got to the conclusion when we talk about it that it is conceptual and therefore, we are in the mind, it is just the idea of it, it is what Swami pointed out in telling us when we talk about truth, it is just a concept. 

Truth is the direct experience. Truth is the effort to think it over and writing it down, it takes time, there is a result and there is a decision, we have to do it and that makes it real, decision, time, effort and result. 

If we tell that we think God is the mind as well, we just think God is everything, but it is the conceptual level. It is just thinking and thinking is based on imagination and in the West we have a lot of that and I tried to point out the difference between imagination and a concept only and direct experience. 

The sutra of Patanjali tells us that we need for correct understanding three things, direct perception, inference and the words of the self-realized authority. 

We had all that present as it was about his words and a study circle. 

We have the direct perception as experience, inference as discrimination, it means not 'mind is God as well', but listening to the words of the self-realized authority. If we have statements like mind is God as well, it is really the basic problem and not just ignorance that people don't listen to him. In front of us in his words he said, God is bliss and she said, mind is God as well. 

We had his words in front of us and we look at it and read it and still they are not listening to his words, but to the mind and get to the conclusion, mind is as well God if God is everything. 

I said that it is based on imagination and therefore, it is not a right conclusion and the mind is not it. The basic understanding why we meditate is not there really, if God is as well the mind, why should we do an effort of going beyond the mind?

It is just not thought over and if we don't see it in our own life, we cannot understand it. 

What she is wanted to tell or point out is that everything is God and made by God, but what is missing is the basic understanding that the mind is the result of wrong identification with the body. 

I don't know how to describe it, no discrimination, no realization, a mess only?

No wisdom if we don't know that the mind is the result of body consciousness and wrong identification, the basics is just not there. 

It is questioning it still the same way. The thinking it over shows no result really but for me as I was thinking it over. At least from one person in the group we cannot see any result at all. What is kind of scary is the statement that his words are painful and create pain, how can we get to such conclusions? How can we get to such conclusions and not put it in question, but enforcing it on others? 

It is like no way out, they turn in the same mind pattern and talk about mind patterns at the same time, but they are expressing just that and they don't go beyond it because they don't listen to him. When he talks about truth, it is truth and not the mind and that difference seems not to be there at all. 

It feels like we have the light body cult practiced in one of his schools by former students of Sai Baba just because of that. They must have noticed that people don't listen and it is like a sickness really and there is no discrimination, but the basic idea everything is God. The wisdom that the idea of it is imagination and mind and that it has to be direct perception only is not there. It is not clear what is mind and what the Atma, and we talk about God, but it is generalized and not understood that it has to be real and not conceptual. 

It had to be direct perception and we all have the experience, but we never get aware that we have to realize it. We all have the experience of it and they tell people, Swami tells me that you should give a certain amount of donations for building schools and doing good, they write the richest of the Sai devotees telling them, Swami told me he wants a donation just from you and they do it because it makes them feel good to think that they are that special that Swami asks for it, they get the attention they have been longing for and give donations thinking it is Swami. 

And they think as well, all is God, if he is everything it is just a different means to donate some money and to help, it is for a good cause and the question we have to ask is, why it is not Swami and why it is not true. 

If we blend truth and right action (Dharma) we have peace. If we separate truth and right action, only pieces will be left. It is not the same peace or pieces ...

Pieces is not a nice experience, peace is a great experience. Pieces cannot be the basis for bliss, it destroys it and peace is the bases for bliss. Therefore, one is truth the other is untruth, how can it be Swami or the same? How can we call it as well God? Bliss is God, if there are only pieces left it for sure will not result in bliss, so how can it be divine?

If it truth it is only God, if it is untruth it is the opposite of God and evil and we call it as well the devil, but they tell us, it is good for all and doing good and who is benefiting from it? The devil and God it is all the same, he created as well the devil. 

If it is untruth, it is not true. If it is based on illusion, it is not based on truth. 

It is not the same and it is not right or a right conclusion to call it Swami or God as well. 

People don't think it over and don't see it in their own lives and that is why they cannot understand it. One is right action, one is not right action, it means there is a difference like day and night. 

Not only we have to think it over, but we as well have to see it in our own lives to be able to understand it, there is quite some effort involved of getting there. 

It is not a good feeling getting aware of that standstill, there is no progress if we have always the same questions coming up at the beginning and five years later again, it like we deal with the same again and again and it is always the same level, a kind of sick questioning on the wrong level, they just question and they don't listen it seems they ask wrong questions. 

I wonder if it is real that it got easier. And I don't even know, it is like nobody sees it anyhow, but I avoid the big gatherings as same questioning thing based on not realizing that we have to listen and that what's missing is the listening and it is all based on them thinking they know when we don't know. The listing starts, when we realize that we don't know and as long as we are not aware that we don't know we don't see any need of listening. In bigger meetings it is the same only hundred fold as there are hundreds of it thinking they know and nobody see the need of listening to him. 

How can you know? 

He is telling us why? His words not mine. 

How can anyone know? And why his words are that much pain for me? How can we answer such questions? We just don't answer, why should I know why it is that much pain for her and why she is asking that question? 

She is putting her frustration out in the room and telling me, nothing has changed. 

What is the aim of her asking those questions if she doesn't want an answer? She asks to ask and not to get an answer. I don't like her and it is her way of thinking in trying to get attention with crooked ways of questioning and it is just to question and not for getting an answer. She throws the question out there and she doesn't want an answer, so why she is questioning it and why she doesn't realize that the answer is in the divine words in front of her eyes and not out there?

We are not meant to give an answer, his words, he is giving the answer or not and if he is only pain for her, then it is only pain and not joy and bliss, enjoy, listening to him is finding the answer in his words and not in our own mind or as some claim in their own hearts or that he is talking to them. 

There was one person she said that she would like Swami to answer her, like good morning, how are you doing. It is all mind level and projection on the mind level and a kind of immature expectation that Swami will answer on that level. 

Not much sense of reality. 

He said he is the man coming in our dreams to awaken, that is real and then we have insights, dreams and we have to listen to him to get to a right conclusion.