The external is the creation of the internal. Brahmam manifested itself as the Universe. God created the world; the world conferred the glory of 'Creator' on God. Through his yearning, imagination and intensity man endowed God with a form and name, and a bunch of attributes from which he hopes to benefit. But, God is above and beyond human traits and characteristics known as Gunas. Krishna told Arjuna in the Bhagavad Gita, "I have no need to engage Myself in any activity. But yet, I am busy acting, in order to promote the well-being of the Universe." The Gita refers to its chapters as Yoga. Yoga means union of the Self with its source. How do the eighteen chapters, each Yoga, help man to fulfill his destiny? The Gita provides the answer: "Samathvam Yogam Uchyathe" (Yoga is being in a state of equal-mindedness or equanimity).
Baba (thought for the day)
The problem is if we do not have the experience of it, we cannot really talk about it.
As it goes beyond the mind and it is 'bigger than the biggest and smaller than the smallest' and it is too big and too small to be imagined as it goes beyond the mind. Everything we perceive is in the mind and not beyond the mind. There is no way we can get the experience on the mind level, but we have to get it anyhow and how do we do it?
We get to the insight with Tapas, spiritual work. We take the insight and think it over in the light of his words, whatever is coming up in the mind in listening to his words and we see it in our own life and that is how we make a connection between the wisdom and our own experience and doing that we have to go on no matter what obstacles are there.
Listen, think it over and absorb and Baba's words, not our words.
He is the knower, we are in the mind and have to think his words over to get it and it takes some time to absorb, but if we do it regularly we will understand the insight 'I am that' and we get to the insight 'I am the one'.
He is the insight and with the 'insight' we are also able to understand it, but it is actually he who understands it, because he is the insight and he is also the following step, if he is not present as 'insight' our mind will not be able to understand it.
We are like imprisoned in the body and the mind and if we go beyond it, the experience is not in the mind and as we think we are the mind and the body, as long as we are identified with it, in our experience it is 'he' who makes the experience and he is the insight and if we have insights and we do not understand it, we have to get the answer or right insight in listening, thinking it over to get able to absorb the divine reality in our own being.
If we forget that we are the higher self, we will also not be aware of the reality of divinity in our own being and we cannot recognize the avatar and why is that so? It has to do with projection, whatever our own reality and what we are living, we project outside in the others and it mirrors back to us like the same, even if it is only subjective and not at all the others reality.
In living in the ashram I began to project devotees in everybody I met, just because of that reality present with Sai Baba, but he took care of the level of consciousness of people. As soon as we left his presence, it was like a changed reality and it took not too long was everything upside down. It felt like real difficult to understand because it had to do with the Maya in his presence. The men were all dressed in white and so they looked like no difference, but it was all projection only.
I experienced it with more than one person that they looked all different in Baba's presence and the change was extreme as soon as they went back in their environment and the mind reality they lived outside of the ashram and as meditation was not needed, there was no change at all and in the opposite, as most of them thought that they know love and they didn't do the least effort to understand it, what is actually difficult to understand, there was also no meditation or effort done to understand it right.
A lot of Westerners seem to not have the least idea what is meant by Tapas and that Baba asks them to do Tapas, they just do not hear it. They hear only what they want to hear.
They hear only love and thinking that they know love, they don't go on questioning and even less listening, they just sing Bhajans, that is easier and we do not have to ask questions. And also in our center we notice that there are obstacles in listening to Baba's words, what is in India really no problem and understood. They know that they have to listen to him, the Westerner thinks they have to know themselves and that means they are in the mind.
He is the knower, it means practically, we cannot know, but I went into a relationship like that and it also was not okay. In the beginning for me in his presence, I knew already that I don't know and that I couldn't make a decision, therefore, I based it on him only and it still didn't work, because it was that guy who said he knew and he just took advantage of it. I had totally problems with the outcome of that story until Baba said in the insight 'that he took only advantage of it'.
So I went for the Eastern way and tried to do it with 'him', knowing that I couldn't possibly know and met a Westerner who said he knew and he took advantage of it in that way.
I think I have never felt worse in a relationship, because it was in that very moment when I trusted and there was only that way to trust the he would tell if it was wrong and not take the letter if it was wrong and before we didn't trust and it was all due to the presence of Sai Baba and just in that moment it happened and that guy could just take advantage of it. Thus the question was what didn't we understand right and why we didn't understand it?
I was meditating regularly and I was more in meditation than not but there was an old story coming up with the parent's house and the neighborhood and the reality that I had been let down by my family. That guy in the neighborhood managed to disturb my parent's house in such a way that I didn't wanted to go back and when I went to Singapore to get a new visa and I avoided my own country, that reality came up and by that everything what had not been okay in my parent's house. There is a change, because in understanding it and seeing it right, we get back to the feeling of the parent's house as it had been before when it was not yet disturbed.
It was after all not a good feeling to realize that everything is mind only and that only he knows, because it made me feel totally helpless and that is also what happened, it exposed me to that guy because of my family background and the family letting me down. I didn't know what it was and because I didn't know, I was avoiding going back.
It was in the air as 'catastrophe' above the head of my father, but I didn't know why 'catastrophe' and now I begin to realize it. The 'insight' is not just understood. Baba said in the 'insight' that he is the insight and the following step, but it means I have to understand it and get to the right answer. If 'he knows' I had to trust that he would help me to go the right path and he made all those problems with my parent's house come up. That was for me the only possibility to understand it, I had to jump and swim and as it turned out I didn't know how to swim.
Whatever I had heard before I didn't hear that we had to listen and to think it over and to absorb the knowledge. I only got it after I did it and it was after a long time only. It took such a long time that I thought …, no Westerner will ever do that, only the Indians, they do it as they know it already in their culture and they know the principle since childhood, they never thought that they should know themselves, they always knew that he knows and in the West it is practically not understood.
So I didn't know how to swim and meditation alone didn't do it, otherwise, I would have known before. I began very early with meditation.
I based it on him only as he knows and when he took a letter I thought that it was clear and that is was him and even if it was a lesson, I had to go for it and it was about the most stupid thing I could do, because he didn't share the spiritual path, afterwards he said that he went the path of least effort, so he was not a help but an obstacle and it was all misunderstood and he never did TM and he understood only 'path of least effort' and he didn't do anything at all, not even meditation. He is actually the most stupid person I have ever met and he said that he knew, when in reality he just took advantage of it. So Sai Baba got me out of it and afterwards began the last part of it when we had to realize it and why it didn't work and every time when he told me that 'I was stupid' I felt like throwing up because I had trusted in him only. We gave him a letter and he took it and I went for it sure that it was his 'Lila' and his doing, but after all it was just giving power away and I regretted that I didn't go to Osho before, because he said that I should come to him and that he would give me 'power', so I went for it later on thinking that it was really the only thing I should have had, more power and not all that talk about love only what resulted in such a relationship. After so many years waiting as it seemed for nothing I had enough and after all it was good to go into dynamic meditation and to go for the inner child work. We talked a lot about the parent's house in that work and I began to understand that it was upside down and not as it should have been and that is the real reason why I didn't come back to my country and I wanted to stay away always. There was a time, as soon as I came back, I wanted to leave again, no wonder I had spent have of my life abroad, but my ex took only advantage of it.
The catastrophe in my parent's house began when the relationship with the neighbor didn't work out and from there on, even if I tried to do my best and everything I could do to make it better, it was impossible. I couldn't organize my life, it was too disturbed and therefore, I was constantly working on it, trying to get it right and with everything, with meditation and the spiritual path it was not possible and Baba told me when he left the body only in the inner view.
Even after my mother came back from Spain there was no change and during my Osho time the inner master said that she was too old, so it didn't help.
The same with the brothers and sister and the question was still if I would have been with Osho years ahead if it would have been different, but I went to India to Sai Baba. The way it turned out in a nervous breakdown in Portland, I was not sure anymore if it was the right thing I did when I went to India and I had been sure then, but it didn't turn out well for us.
And it would have been a shock for my parents and my family and that would have been good and I knew it and that is why I didn't do it, as I didn't know what they did to me. The Hare Krishnas and Sai Baba were also a shock, but not shocking enough. Osho would have been much harder for them to take.
And I was getting aware of it only after Baba left the body and after he made an inside relationship, it was impossible with the family as I had been let down by them.
So it is really due to being let down by the family that it was not possible to organize my life better and it was a shock to get aware of it.
After we went to Baba and didn't come back, my ex told us only that he chose the path of least effort and it made no sense first, but in the meantime it does. It turned everything upside down, if he appeared like following Baba before, afterwards he didn't anymore, even if he went every year for a month to India, it didn't mean a thing, because he didn't follow the inner master. He followed only the mind and the path of least effort and he made out of the mind tendency a 'fake spiritual path', what leads not to higher consciousness, but to an 'insight' of ice, it means it is not only not right but worse, because he does the opposite.
I have never met someone more stupid than he is, because he is until now not aware of it.
It is just another way of telling us that he is an opportunist and that he takes advantage of everything coming around in his life and he doesn't use any discrimination and he doesn't care enough to get aware of how stupid he really is.
Baba tells us that Tapas and the spiritual path is first discrimination, second seeing it in our own life and third going on no matter what obstacles are there.
As the first is not there, no mention about the second, he is blind and never questions to see it in his own life. It means whatever arranges him and his mind and the frozen state of mind is for him Baba and going on whatever obstacles are there he would just interpret as Baba whatever arranges his mind only.
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